The first sex with a new partner – from a meeting №1 to at least a month later

“Shirt on the floor” is the new section of “24 hours” for sex.

“Shirt on the floor” is the new section of “24 hours” for sex. Inspired by the popular men’s replica line “My shirt looks best on the floor in your bedroom”, it draws attention to the male point of view. It will be published every Saturday by Dimitar Martinov.

You have met a great woman / man, you are arranging a date, but the question of when is the time for the first sex is pending. Well, you can’t ask, and the right answer can’t really be given out of context.

In recent years, sex on a first date is not taboo. Of course, it is more likely in certain circumstances. Some women worry that a man can expect it if they met on Tinder. The app has a reputation for being a quick dump. Yes, it is a fact that many men offer it. However, his reputation is not due to this, but to the fact that many women accept. However, sex on a first date is not mandatory.

Britain’s Alicia Spinet admits that she deliberately had sex on a first date. “That’s how I know if the man just wants to sleep with me and not call me again. I’ve had 3 cases of people I dated for a while before we had sex. However, they didn’t call me after the first time, “she said.

There is a similar case in our country, it has even become a meme. It is an excerpt from a chat in which a girl writes to the boy: “And what, 2 months of dinners, meetings, movies, theater, we had sex and so on,” and the young man replied: “Oh, right, it was a great pain.”

Psychologists and sexologists are categorically against sex on the first date. They believe that too early intimate relationships will not lead to anything good. Some even say that if you want to have sex with someone on a first date, you have to wait until the second. This way you will be sure of your decision, which may have been provoked not by attraction, but by a momentary state. In fact, the second meeting turns out to be the one that almost no one thinks is suitable for the first intimate contact.

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The third meeting is about sex. This was the belief in one of the episodes in the first season of the series “Sex and the City”. “I thought you were serious about this man. You can’t sleep with him on the first date, “Charlotte told Carrie, who said she would follow the rule for the third date. The episode sets a trend that many are following. There is even a study that the meetings are only up to the third, then they are just a “meeting” without a number. And yet, ladies and gentlemen, the episode did not follow the rule. Carrie Bradshaw slept with her husband on the first date. And no, that’s not a euphemism for something else. The man was Tuzar, whom the curly New Yorker eventually married.

In fact, it is the relationship between Carrie and the man who only became known as John in the last episode of the series that is the starting point for some. They believe that they can sleep with a new partner only when they are convinced that he is not seeing anyone else. A pass Carrie Bradshaw had made. “It is logical that if I sleep with someone, I want to be convinced that he is only with me,” said Irina Stoyanova from Sofia. Petar Kirilov points out another detail. “Look, I always use condoms, but I still won’t sleep with a woman if I’m not convinced that she’s only seeing me,” the man said.


Ioan Vasilev uses another criterion. She sleeps with a new partner only after he has introduced her to his friends. “I’m not looking for a number. “If the boy has decided to introduce me to his friends, then he has serious intentions,” she said. And she explains that she had 3 serious relationships. What they had in common was that you slept with the boys after they introduced her to their friends. In other cases, the boys dumped her quickly, and one even immediately after the first sex.

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Waiting a month is also not uncommon. For 2-3 meetings, each country can pretend and be presented in a favorable light. However, such an illusion cannot be maintained for a whole month, the supporters of this theory believe.

And a 2017 Durex poll of 20,000 American adults found that most men thought a fifth date was the first time they had sex. The women pointed to the ninth. A study on the same topic of “Grupon” from 2021 reduces the number by 1 meeting for both sexes.

However, there are those who are waiting longer. I never fail to tell the story of Vlado, who was dating his classmate when he was 18. They went out for 9 months without having sex. She had told him they would do it after the prom. They separated a week before him.

And although this is hardly the case these days, there are still people who wait until their first wedding night before being intimate. And that’s where the fouls happen – Charlotte York from “Sex and the City” knows best, because she had adopted this tactic with Trey McDougall. And sometimes it leads to funny events. My friends had decided to wait until the first wedding night for religious reasons. “Brother, after the wedding we counted the money and fell asleep,” said Janko, who will try to kill me. (Janko, brother, you can’t – b.a.)if you read these lines. Fortunately, he and his wife woke up in the middle of the night and got the job done.

And when the moment of the first sex passes, a new question follows – do we have a relationship, or are we just friends with benefits? This will be the topic of the next issue of “Shirt on the floor”.

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