What are the most frequent arguments in the family?

Arguing about children, past mistakes, or choices between them is a recurring theme in most families. Understanding why we argue over these issues can help find solutions.

Disputes over the past

We all have anecdotes about family members who are not always very rewarding for them. Unfortunately, family reunions are often an opportunity for one or the other to tell them and to provoke anger or shame in the one who is concerned.

In general, therefore, avoid telling stories about your loved ones if they are not kind to them. Prefer to ask the person concerned if he accepts that you tell the anecdote rather than embarrassing him.

Disputes over the choices of adult children

Who does not know one day hearing advice or criticism from his parents on his own choices as an adult? However, in some cases, the critics rain to the point of becoming real harassment.

To avoid the problem, do not hesitate to express your choices clearly while asking your parents with respect if they are willing to respect them. You can for example tell them that you appreciate their advice and their advice but that you have confidence in your decision-making capacities for your future or your couple.

As for parents, to defuse a conflict, do not hesitate to say how you feel to your child, but in the form of wishes and not demands.

Disputes over child rearing

Everyone has their own vision of education and discipline. Grandparents, uncles and aunts can not help but put their grain of salt and criticize the way you raise your children.

To avoid arguments, politely thank them for their advice while suggesting that your educational principles are not exactly the same. If, on the other hand, you are a grandparent, remember that it is not up to you to take over the children but to share them with their parents in the form of advice, respecting their role.

Find out more: “Family conflicts: How to get out of relational dead ends between parents and children” by Giorgio Nardone, Enrick B editions.

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