Going to the beach can be quite an adventure. Finding a good place this summer is being a mission only suitable for the bravest (or early risers). Another of the most complicated tasks is to prevent anyone from approaching your area more than necessary. But even the safety distance stipulated by the pandemic does not seem to have any kind of value for some bathers.
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Even when you manage to overcome all these obstacles, it may be that the weather is not good, that the water is too cold or downright dirty. But don’t worry, on any beach in the country you can entertain yourself by observing and identifying prototypical characters. And there is a great variety.
This is what the Twitter user @magnateUSA has done, who has created a hilarious thread in which he shreds all the types of people who fulfill some kind of beach cliché. Do you identify with any?
The builder. Man who has been passing his son for 11 months, but the time of year has come when he has to show that he is a good father. His way of doing it is by building any shit out of the sand. Everyone who passes by wants to step on it. pic.twitter.com/dnBK22yvIo
— Donald Trump ???????? ᶠᵃᵏᵉ (@magnateUSA) August 19, 2021
The kids with the ball. Group of kids who form a group to pass the ball with their feet, with their hands or with their dick, any extremity is worth it. The diameter of the huddle extends to cover the entire beach because they are worse than a second-hand Dacia. pic.twitter.com/RaJi556MBQ
— Donald Trump ???????? ᶠᵃᵏᵉ (@magnateUSA) August 19, 2021
Sundays, the builder, those with the shovels, the kids with the ball … but there are still more, such as DJs. This is how the user defines them: “Group of young people who set the beach with music. Before they brought a radio cassette player that could be seen for miles and played the radio. Now they have mutated into a more dangerous variant: more widespread (with a mobile phone and a speaker is enough) and more damaging (they put reggaeton) “
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Did you think this was it? No, friend or friend. On the beach there is space for many more groups, such as lifeguards, elderly ladies with chairs or vendors.
The older ladies in the chairs. They are like a tennis referee, they sit and control what happens in the arena. Lying near them is a guarantee that you will not be robbed and that you will have less privacy than with a Russian application installed. pic.twitter.com/ESfRalmgHi
— Donald Trump ???????? ᶠᵃᵏᵉ (@magnateUSA) August 19, 2021
Los VIPs (Very Important Playeros). They are the ones who use the paid hammocks. They look down on the rest of the bathers while they drink an exclusive cocktail from the beach bar that is actually made with Knebep vodka from Mercadona. pic.twitter.com/t63mLWicCC
— Donald Trump ???????? ᶠᵃᵏᵉ (@magnateUSA) August 19, 2021
The one with the massages. He has more clothes on him than a Ryanair passenger who checks a suitcase. He can only say two words: “jalou masash”. Some foreigner always falls. pic.twitter.com/Oyx6UMFn0J
— Donald Trump ???????? ᶠᵃᵏᵉ (@magnateUSA) August 19, 2021
And watch out for swimmers. Or rather, the Michael Phelps: “He can’t swim well and he doesn’t know the sea, but he’s on vacation and that’s reason enough to think he’s a professional and swim freely in open water. The buoy is sweating his cock. He ends up getting a lifeguard beep “.
If you want to know more profiles such as the nudist, the ‘roomba’ or the ‘Luis Fonsi’, do not hesitate to take a look at this magnificent hilo.
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