Navigating a Sleepless Situation & Family Obligations: Advice from Dear Abby
A reader from New York is wrestling with a challenging dilemma: a deeply uncomfortable sofa bed at her parents’ vacation home is making the prospect of visiting unbearable, yet she fears hurting their feelings by revealing the truth.The situation is compounded by her parents’ belief that the bed is perfectly acceptable, based on positive feedback from othre guests – feedback the daughter suspects is merely polite. Travel to the vacation home requires flying, eliminating the option of day trips. She’s exhausted her supply of excuses and is seeking guidance.
Dear Abby’s response is direct: “For heaven’s sake, quit waffling and tell your father and stepmother the truth!” Abby emphasizes that honesty isn’t rude, particularly when the discomfort is personal. She suggests the parents, if financially able, could invest in a new mattress or even consider sharing the cost with their daughter.
In other advice columns, Dear Abby addressed separate concerns.A reader from the Midwest questioned the obligation to participate in gift-giving for relatives they have little to no relationship with, stemming from a large and fragmented family.Abby affirmed that there’s no obligation to attend events or send gifts in such circumstances, suggesting a card with well wishes as a generous choice.
a reader from Indiana described feeling excluded by a group of long-time friends who frequently socialize outside of their monthly lunch and card games, and attempt to conceal these gatherings. Abby acknowledged the potential for hurt feelings and advised broadening one’s social circle while still attempting to enjoy the existing friendship.
Dear Abby’s column is written by Abigail Van Buren, also known as Jeanne Phillips, continuing the legacy founded by her mother, Pauline Phillips.Readers can contact Dear Abby at www.DearAbby.com or P.O. Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.
A booklet, ”The Anger in All of Us and How to Deal With It,” is available for $8 (U.S. funds) – including shipping and handling – by sending a name, mailing address, and check or money order to: Dear Abby, Anger Booklet, P.O. Box 446, King Mills, OH 45034-0446.
