Author Reveals New Understanding of Mother’s Gambling as Search for “Fairytale Ending”
Sydney, Australia - Author Toni Jordan has shared a poignant reflection on her late mother’s gambling habit, moving from judgment to a deeper understanding of it as a desperate attempt at self-discovery and a longing for a transformative life change. in an excerpt from her new book,Tenderfoot,published in The Guardian,Jordan details how her mother’s actions,including a dramatic act of destroying her purse and setting it alight,now appear less as addiction and more as a search for a unique identity.Jordan recounts her mother’s sharp intelligence – capable of complex mental calculations despite leaving school in year 10 with typing and shorthand qualifications – and her strong working-class pride.The author notes her mother’s deliberate rejection of perceived pretension, evidenced by her outspoken manner, casual dress (“thongs everywhere”), and frequent reminders to ”Don’t forget your place.”
However, Jordan now believes this outward display of working-class identity was a facade, a “lady who doth protest too much,” masking a deeper desire for distinction without the perceived “striving” of becoming “up yourself.” She posits that her mother, lacking exposure to arts, literature, or travel, was perpetually bored and frustrated, yearning for a “fairytale ending” where she would be revealed as someone extraordinary.
The piece highlights a crucial distinction between the experiences of middle-class and working-class women during the 1960s, noting that while the decade brought change for the former, working-class women like those in Jordan’s family continued to work in conventional roles – shops, farms, factories, or domestic service - without experiencing a “feminist revolution.”
jordan theorizes that her mother viewed gambling as a path to self-betterment that didn’t require altering her core identity. “Making money from gambling didn’t require her to speak differently or act differently or look differently,” she writes. Despite never achieving a significant win, Jordan is certain her mother’s motivations were not laziness or greed, but a desire to provide for her daughters. “She would have spent all of it on a car, or even a house, for my sister and me,” Jordan concludes, emphasizing her mother’s selfless nature.The excerpt underscores the complex relationship between class, identity, and the pursuit of a better life, framing gambling not simply as a vice, but as a desperate attempt to rewrite a predetermined narrative.Tenderfoot by Toni Jordan (Hachette Australia, $33) is available now.
