John Mulaney Satirizes Baby Boomer Generation in SNL Woodstock Sketch

Woodstock attendee John Mulaney shared uncool ideas on Saturday Night Live about how his baby boomer generation should live as they aged.

While listening to Sly and the Family Stone at the 1969 music festival, Mulaney pitched an odd suggestion to his friends. “Hey, when we get older, I think we should buy all the houses,” he said.

When Andrew Dismukes expressed confusion, Mulaney expanded on the plan. “Our generation, the baby boomers, when we get older, I think we should just buy as many houses as we can get, and just like, have them,” he said.

“Also, we should have all the money,” he went on.

Sarah Sherman, Kenan Thompson, and Mikey Day played skeptical friends while Mulaney insisted their spirit of generosity should flip. He suggested the shift happen “in fifteen years, like 1985 or so.”

“We should become ruthless corporate climbers that absolutely fetishize money in an almost pornographic way. Far out, right?” Mulaney said.

After being offered marijuana, Mulaney offered another proposal.

“We should scare our kids about this stuff,” he said, prompting objections from the group.

Mulaney then detailed his vision for the mid-1980s. “I feel like in 1985—hey, there’s that year again, feel like it’s going to be a big year for us—we should tell our kids if they smoke weed even once, it’ll ruin their lives. And not just weed, everything,” Mulaney said.

“Everything we should enjoy, we tell our kids that it will kill them stone-ass dead,” he said.

When a friend replied that only hard drugs should come with a warning, Mulaney disagreed. “No, we should make our kids do speed: ritalin, adderall, just shove it down their entire childhood so they can get into college,” he said.

After a friend noted how easy it is to get into college, Mulaney advised changing that a lot. Following a lull in the music, Mulaney’s next remark drew even more backlash.

“Hey, I think we should be Republicans,” he said.

He followed that up by telling his companions, “I don’t think we should die.”

His final plan for the future concluded the sketch. “Even though it’s cold, and we can’t hear any of the bands, and we’re standing in mud and feces, I think we should say this concert was like incredible and life-changing,” Mulaney said.

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