Navigating Rules at Grandparents’ House: Finding the Right Balance
Spending time with grandparents is a cherished experience for many children, often filled with special treats and a more relaxed atmosphere. But this can raise a common question for parents: should grandparents be allowed to bend the rules? experts suggest a nuanced approach, focusing on communication and understanding.
A study by the Study Group of Methods of Sociological Analysis (Gemass) of the Sorbonne highlights that while parents are primarily responsible for setting and enforcing rules, grandparents often have implicit permission to “transgress and circumvent” them. This isn’t about undermining parental authority, but recognizing a different dynamic.
Nantes-based psychologist advocates for a degree of parental adaptability. Small deviations from routine – a slightly later bedtime, for example – can be harmless and even contribute to the enjoyment of a visit. “It’s all a question of dosage,” the psychologist insists.
Initial conversations about expectations are key. Parents can certainly remind grandparents of critically important rules regarding hygiene, sleep, or eating habits, acknowledging that they were, after all, parents themselves and understand these needs. Grandparents, in turn, generally understand the established educational principles of their own children and avoid significant departures from them.
However, open communication is crucial when issues become more sensitive. Valérie P. recommends that both parents and grandparents address concerns directly,”with calm and restraint.” Grandparents shouldn’t hesitate to offer their opinions or suggestions if they disagree with a particular approach to discipline or care.
Ultimately, a successful arrangement relies on mutual respect and a shared goal: ensuring the child’s well-being and a positive experience for everyone involved.
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(Source: Destination Santé)
