He wonders all the time: Who is the greatest villain in movie history? “Oh, it’s Darth Vader with his funny lungs!”, “No, it’s Thanos with his prune finger snapping!”, “It’s the Joker with his face paintings!”, “It’s Hannibal Lecter with his Beans!”
No. They are all wrong answers, answers punishable by death in the higher courts of ‘Obvious and probably factually correct’ answers that are still really wrong.
No. On the 35th anniversary of its release, the correct answer lies in Highlander, the flashy 1986 fantasy adventure, the movie that gave us the timeless phrase of “there can only be one,” with its utterly diabolical villain, the Kurgan. .
He is, to put it bluntly, a real bastard.
(Image credit: Paramount Pictures)
There can be only one
A bit of atmosphere for those unfamiliar with the movie. Highlander is a centuries-long sci-fi action epic, centered on 16th century Scotsman Connor MacLeod (a Christopher Lambert with a baffling accent). The film sees immortal warriors from around the world fighting through the centuries to win ‘The Prize’, a kind of definitive knowledge of the thoughts and secrets of humanity. Being immortal, these warriors live forever, surviving stabs and blows, explosions and gunshots, but they cannot survive without their heads. State the excuse for plenty of sword fights and beheadings, as a mysterious force lures the remaining immortals into New York for a final showdown of the 20th century.
Is Highlander good? Objectively… probably not. It’s all a bit silly and too much B-movie fun for movie snobs to take seriously. It really is a scary dad movie. Sean Connery plays an ancient Egyptian Spaniard with musketeer facial hair, a pearl earring and a defiant Scottish accent, all of which is soundtracked by Freddie Mercury and Queen’s falsetto in its most metal form. This is the kind of bold nonsense we’re dealing with here. But it has a fantastic concept, some jaw-dropping action sequences, and stunning mountainous scenery to bathe in, enough to make it a cult classic and a guilty pleasure.
Is it an undoubtedly excellent item? Yes, you guessed it: the Kurgan. In equal parts Conan The Barbarian, WWE’s Undertaker and Motorhead’s Lemmy, has walked the Earth for millennia, a contemporary of Atilla the Hun and Ghengis Khan, cutting off heads of immortal rivals and enjoying themselves greatly in the process.
(Image credit: Paramount Pictures)
It’s Clancy Brown under the gothic makeup and barbarian wardrobe of the Kurgan. He’s perhaps best known these days for his role as Captain Byron Hadley, prison guard, in The Shawshank Redemption, or even as Thor Ragnarok’s CGI Monstrosity Sutur. Incredibly, he is also the voice of Mr. Krabs in SpongeBob SquarePants. But his breakthrough came as the Kurgan in Highlander, a crazed and vile character, and an absolute pleasure to watch.
Brown steals each and every scene he’s in, including those in front of the legendary Sean Connery. A towering and muscular 6’3 ”tall, Brown walks a fine line between the driven executioner and the bloodthirsty savage. One scene shows him swinging his broadsword around a messy New York house like a ballerina, another striking a fellow immortal warrior with animal fury.
There is a ridiculous cruelty to Brown’s performance that he obviously enjoys, a cruel smile on his face even as he impales a defenseless victim in his Claymore. The Kurgan loves to be shit, basically, and you can tell that Clancy Brown loves to be the Kurgan, to be shit.
Here are some of the twisted things Kurgan does on the Highlander:
Decapitate at least two people Survive having his throat slit to win a battle with a master swordsman Later decorate the resulting scar on his throat with safety pins Wear a helmet made from the skull of a bear Survive a shot from a submachine gun Steal a grandmother’s car and drives off with her clinging to the hood Destroy an entire castle in the Highlands with just her sword and brute force Lick a priest …
Watch? A real bastard. All of this being around 3,000 years old.
Room for a new version?
But it’s also the little things. While chasing McLeod’s love interest, Brenda Wyatt, through his apartment building, he too enjoys a lollipop. Put out the flames of prayer candles in a church, all for a laugh. He doesn’t really give a shit: having lived as long as he, morality and humanity, civilization is just a big pointless joke. He’s a true nihilist, playing chicken in a stolen car down the sidewalk, running over pedestrians with his hands off the wheel and his fingers over his eyes. As he yells at the parishioners of the Big Apple church he’s sheltering in (before a pantomime twist), “I have something to say! Better to burn out than to fade away! «
For years, a reboot of Highlander has been in the works, with John Wick director Chad Stahelski leading the project since late 2016. Previous rumors saw Dave Bautista from Guardians of the Galaxy linked to the infamous rebooted role of Kurgan. He definitely has the strength, but can he bring out the deranged evil from the Kurgan, if that casting rumor turns out to be true? Here’s the hope.
Whatever comes next for the Highlander franchise, there’s one thing for sure: They’re going to have a hard time finding a bad guy as deliciously evil as Clancy Brown’s Kurgan.
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