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Most pedophiles reject sex with children: “Is that far away from me”

Nelson says in it interview in the NTR program Danny op Straat he thinks that a child of 2 or 3 years old can best decide if he wants sex with an adult.

“A child of 2 or 3 years old is also developed enough to decide whether he wants an ice cream or wants to go to the playground,” he says. “I think those things can be compared very well.” He also says he wants to set up a political party to make sex with children legal.


Fifteen years

Yet most pedophiles are not after sex with children at all, says forensic psychologist Ellen Janssen of Stop it Now !.

Pedophile Ben Kirssen (not his real name), team member at platform Pedophilia.NL, where pedophiles talk about their feelings, it is incomprehensible that it is precisely this kind of pedophile that gets a stage.


“When I was about 15 years old, I discovered that I might have pedo-feelings,” says Kirssen. “I grew older, but the boys I enjoyed stayed around 11 years old. I was shocked by my own feelings and I couldn’t tell my story with anyone.” Kirssen was in depression.

Stigma

According to Janssen, pedophilia has a stigma. “Pedophilia is an orientation, it’s how you deal with that feeling,” says Janssen. “Pedophile Nelson approves sex with children. He is not representative of all pedophiles, making it very difficult for other pedophiles who do not approve of sex with children to express their feelings to the outside world.”


Pedophiles

A pedophile is a person with sexual feelings for children under the age of 13. Pedophilia is a sexual preference and is not punishable in the Netherlands.

Sexual abuse of children, together with viewing and downloading child pornography, is punishable. Pedophiles do not always do this: a majority of child abusers do not have pedophile feelings, but suffer from antisocial and sexual disorders.


“At one point it was so high up in my mind that I told my best friend. I was about 21 years old at the time. He responded very relaxed, he knew that I am not a child abuser. I never considered having sex with children That is so far away from me “, says Kirssen.

To Paris with loved one

Kirssen is now in his 50s and has accepted himself. “Of course I always miss something. I would also like to stroll through Paris along the Seine with my beloved. I have accepted that it is not possible.”


His environment also copes well, but sometimes remains hesitant. “When I recently got up at a children’s party to walk to the room where the children were playing, I saw that my brother jumped up too. There is a feeling of unrest, but I understand that,” says Kirssen.


Wrong image

According to forensic psychologist Janssen, it is important to keep the subject open for discussion. “Otherwise people might get a wrong impression of pedophiles and they will think that they are all like Nelson,” says Janssen.

Kirssen also finds it important that young pedophiles can go somewhere with their story and that they are listened to. “Child abuse is just as difficult for me to understand as it is for other people. People often don’t realize that,” says Kirssen. According to Janssen, 80 percent of child abusers are not pedophiles. According to her, we must have an eye for this group to prevent sexual child abuse.


Are you worried about your sexual feelings for minors?

You can do it for free and anonymously Stop it now! dial: 0800 – 266 64 36. The organization works with specialists who help people with sexual feelings and / or behavior towards minors.


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