New parents of referent students on the subject of bullying will soon appear in certain schools in Seine-et-Marne. Those who took part in the online training given this Saturday by FCPE 77 showed their willingness to be able to help parents and children affected by this scourge. In France, 700,000 young people say they have experienced bullying at school.
From their homes in Combs-la-Ville, Coulommiers, Roissy-en-Brie, Pontault-Combault, Villeparisis, Crégy-lès-Meaux, Avon or Nangis, these FCPE parents’ delegates followed the recommendations by videoconference. and advice from Stéphanie Durel, their president, and Fernando Oliveira, the (only) referent on the subject within the departmental federation.
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From primary to high school, the FCPE 77 has identified a dozen heavy cases over the past three years, in particular in Chelles, Bussy-Saint-Georges, Pontault-Combault, Champs-sur-Marne, Vaux-le-Pénil and Savigny-le -Temple, where two cases have been reported. Four of these children went so far as to attempt suicide.
The federation, which offers several training courses to its members, has received around thirty requests to participate in the one on bullying at school. This is where the requests were among the most numerous.
“This is a sign that there is a need,” Fernando Oliveira told the 23 people online this Saturday morning. From their sofa or a room, their children sometimes passing behind their backs, they have found something to answer to parents who ask them.
Advice to give to encourage the child victim to confide – “A harassed child will hide things from his parents because he does not want to worry them, explains Fernando Oliveira. The child must be reassured, listening important “- to more administrative procedures, even legal in the most extreme cases.
“If your child no longer wants to go to school, it is immediately a handrail”
“You have to take things gradually,” says the referee. After discussing it orally with the school, write things down: first in the correspondence book, then by email to the director, then to the district inspector of National Education. “
Then comes the filing of a handrail with the police. “Then a second, even a third, which proves the repetition, recommends Fernando Oliveira. After that, it is the filing of a complaint. If your child is not doing well, if he does not want to go to school anymore, if he cries, it is immediately a handrail: the child must be protected. “
“I certify that the handrail works,” intervenes Emma, a participant. I let the IEN know [NDLR : l’inspecteur de l’Education nationale], who then called me back. The exchanges begin. On the discussion thread of the conference, other feedbacks are being organized.
At the end of the training, some therefore show their willingness to become referents on the subject in their schools. “There are more and more cases and alone, it is not possible”, slips Fernando Oliveira, happy to find support.
Localized facts “rather in cities and in large structures”
The FCPE 77 observes that the acts of harassment take place “more in cities, more in college and primary school and more in large structures”, analyzes Stéphanie Durel. Since the start of the school year in September, three cases have already been reported to it, in the areas of Sénart and Marne-la-Vallée. “One of them seems to be settled following the filing of a handrail,” welcomes the president of the departmental federation.
Mother of two children aged 9 and 12 in Pontault-Combault, Stéphanie Gal, 40-year-old accountant, participated in the morning. Elected at Granet School and Monthéty College, her eldest child was the victim of harassment from another child when he was in primary school.
“He came home from school with bruises on his legs,” she recalls. He said it was because he played soccer at recess. One day, he didn’t want to go to school anymore and was having trouble falling asleep. Another day he came home with a blow to the face. He explained to me that he had been beaten. I asked him if this child was also responsible for the bruises on his legs. He told me yes. At the time, I wasn’t sure what to do except go see his mom. But she was in total denial. “
If the story was finally settled by a well-placed right hook from his elder to his comrade, Stéphanie does not approve of this reaction. “I don’t want violence,” she said. That’s why she enjoyed the training. “We really learned a lot of things,” she says. Now, instead of referring a relative to Fernando Oliveira, I will be able to educate him myself. “